Blog

logo

My Broken Hallelujah

30th June 2017

 

I’m not sure about you but I’m one of those people who has kept a multitude of diaries and journals since I was a young teenager…..(and that’s going back quite a while)!! I love to journal, to store memories that I can look back on from time to time……..and laugh……..or cry..……but most of all just to treasure. There are times I can go for weeks without writing and other times I write more………but it’s something I think I’ll always do.
I’m not a blogger by any stretch of the imagination and while I have shared a few bits here and there over my time in BittyButton, it hasn’t been much. However this is something I really feel God has asked me to share with you…….
Around 5 years ago God changed the direction for our family life forever and since then it’s been one heck of a ride…………..it’s been busier than I could ever have imagined but I see His hand at work and am amazed at where He has brought us.
However, in all of the “busyness” I have to admit that my time spent with God has been limited and I say that to my total shame………….very often He got the last few minutes at the end of the day……..at best………..if I wasn’t too tired…..but over the last number of months, God has been really pushing me to take time, to be still, to get close to Him again and know again what pure joy it is to be in His presence and to walk closely with Him.
This morning was the first time I’ve had in months to get out for a walk…………….. (I’ve just bought myself a new FitBit and while I’m all new fangled with it, it has given me such encouragement to get fit and be active!!). I had four new songs I’d downloaded on a playlist to my phone and I listened to these as I walked. I also wanted to use the time to spend with God…….…in prayer.
There were two things on my heart this morning…….……the first, a beautiful friend and the other, a lovely family……..…both of whom are going through the “worst” time imaginable at the minute……..and as I walked…….prayed ………..and listened to the words of the songs…..the tears actually came rolling down my cheeks……….real, proper tears, it was all I could do not to sob out loud!!! It was the first time in that I had felt SO close to God while I prayed and my heart was just breaking for those I was praying for……….
One of the songs I was listening to was “Bridge over Troubled Waters” (the charity single for the people of Grenfell……who by the way we need to keep remembering) and as I listened to the words…….I saw a picture of God….as the bridge…..over the troubled waters of the two situations I was praying about….and it was a beautiful picture……
God is the bridge over…..and the comfort in……all of our “troubled waters”
He is the bridge from……

  • despair to hope………
  • sickness to healing..……
  • fear to calm……..
  • sadness to joy……….
  • doubt to certain faith…….
  • and from spiritual death to everlasting life.

As the tears came continued to flow………….a new song I’ve been listening to over the past week played…..and the words were amazing……it reminded me that even though I haven’t been as close to God as should…….…and even if all that I have are empty hands and a “Broken Hallelujah”………when I come to God with what I have……….and simply that alone….……he accepts the weak……….broken………pathetic offerings of my heart…..and He listens…..and He answers our prayers.
If you’re in a desert place in your Christian life, if the “busyness” of life is taking its toll on your time spent with God, if you’ve lost that close connection with Him…… can I encourage you to do something about it……..because there is nothing in this world like being in His presence………and feeling close to Him.
Over the past couple of weeks I’ve found the best time for me is the early morning, when the birds in the garden are my only company, before anyone else in the house is up and the “busyness” of the day begins……..I know this won’t work for everyone but I would urge you to aim to set apart a “special” time for you and God.
These are a few of the lyrics from the song “broken hallelujah” …….. look it up and have a listen…… it’s a beautiful song

I don’t always know what to say,
But you’re the one that can hear my heart.
Even though I don’t know what your plan is,
I know you make beauty from these ashes.
I’ve seen joy and I’ve seen pain.
On my knees, I call your name.
Here’s my broken hallelujah.

With nothing left to hold onto,
I raise these empty hands to you.
Here’s my broken Hallelujah

You know the things that have brought me here.
You know the story of every tear.
‘Cause you’ve been here from the very start.
…..So here’s my broken hallelujah.

 

 

Leave a Reply